Back to Basic

So... Everything does have a reason. And I thank God for opening my eyes and allowed me to see. Even if it's a bit late. For what is to come, well, I believe He'll open up more ways for me. Just as He had done countless times before. (How could I have forgotten?)

For I, the Lord your God, will hold your right hand, Saying to you, 'Fear not, I will help you.'

- I saiah41:13 -

Big mistakee!!! 

Now feels even hotter.

Damn. 

Still got a pille of work to do. 

Sigh. 

It was quite nice tho. 

Taste like thick dark choco with alcohol in it. Interesting taste. Tho I could do without the alcohol. Just the thick dark choco already is nice. 

Is not like I'm unloved. Just that I feel she love him more than she love me.
Is not like I hate him. Just that I dislike the way he did stuffs or say things and how it made me act.
Is not like I don't wanna care. Or do I?

I feel like I am bound to do one thing, yet I want another thing.
But then sometimes I don't even know what I want, but one for sure I don't want the one I have now.
Wow, that sounds familiar?

How laughable.

It takes courage to change what you have been doing. But it takes strength to continue.
Sometimes is not just courage, but you're just being rash.

I'm not saying I regret my decisions so far. No. I am glad I made them.

I just need a little bit of help from here on out but I feel like no guiding hands can help me.
I feel so lost, even though I know I shouldn't be.
I feel like a teenager in their rebelling period all over again. Going back to puberty (I don't even remember going through puberty. What was I like before, I wonder?)

I look around me, and all I see is just tired people, lost in their own problems.
If the people around me are so lost and tired, how could I look to them to help me?
We all need help.

How laughable.

Or is it? 

The trip this time reinforce my dislike even more. The people doesn't really smile. They don't really help. It takes us more than 2 times always to get someone's attention to ask for directions. Then when we asked it's a blur of "straight, kiri, straight" and that's it. Or "it's outside at the main entrance." Well, I'm sorry if I don't know where the damn big main entrance are because we came from the other direction. 

Then the walk got lots of stairs, and we are an elderly, an aunty and a kid (I know I'm not but I look like one anyway. They will never not look at me and then ask how old I am) with a wheel chair in hand. But they never give any directions with the lift. They just said "well, problem is it's escalators. No lift." They don't even offer to help. We had to carry our wheelchair all the way down 6 floors through the escalator. Even when we come across a set of stair case with no other way but to carry the wherlcchair up, they don't help. They just stand there and watch us carry it upstairs (and it was just me and my mom too). 

What the hell people. At least in Indo people will always smile at you, or at least the one in the hotels would. It is a service industry people. You work to service. Not to annoy people with your "You ask too many questions and I'm too busy to answer all your questions" attitude. And yes, we can carry our own wheel chair, thanks. But at least do offer to help. We will be very grateful to you. 

Granted not everyone is like that. But out of the 20 people we met, probay only 1 or 2 that will help us without being asked or at least smile when talking to us. 

I don't visit the place often and I do appreciate people smiling at least when giving us directions. Yes we know you are tired for working all day long. But we are in a strange, unfamiliar place and a smile, instead of "I'm tired, go away" face would be great. 

~  Disappointed in KL & Genting

Normal is overrated. What is normal to me is not normal for others. At least that's what's been happening in the past 2-3 months.

Well, 2014. It brings new hope. New goals. New excitements... Or is it? It's been quite tough I guess that the excitement of New Years doesn't really last that long.

Nevertheless, it is no reason to be down. Praise God for He is good! It has been, still is, and probably will always resonate through all my days. It is enough. :)